A Little Perspective

Perspective.  As individuals, our circumstances and experiences allow us to have a perspective that might differ from others.  In fact, two people can see and experience an identical situation and have two very different views and accounts of what happened.  Perhaps this has happened to you and lead to some misunderstanding, or even a fallout, with another person because of these differing views. You see, it is so very easy to jump to conclusions, judge another, or feel inferior to those whose perspectives on life we simply don't understand because we have not lived life through their eyes. We have not walked a mile in their shoes and, therefore, cannot fully appreciate their unique perspective.

I think it is fair to say many people assume the surface impression they have of a person is indicative of their life behind closed doors.

-Live in a nice house in a nice neighborhood?  They must be rich.
-Stay at home with your children?  They must have a lot of free time on your hands
-Out on a date with your spouse?  They must have a good marriage.
-Receiving assistance from the government?  They must be lazy.
-Always smiling?  They must have no problems.

While these are just a few examples of how we may perceive someone's life to be from the snapshot impression we have of them, the truth may be much different.  We cannot understand another's circumstance without walking in their shoes.  We cannot truly know someone by only scratching the surface.  We cannot assume to know someone's story by hearing second-hand accounts.

While I am certainly not hear to say I have never judged a book by it's cover, I am hear to tell you that the book may look very different on the inside than you could ever imagine.  The family with the nice house may have sacrificed the extras and worked really hard to save up money for years to be able to afford that home.  The stay-at-home mom may have very little time to herself between the responsibilities she has taking care of her family, managing the home, and giving of her time to help others.  The couple out on the date may be fighting for their marriage and working on forgiveness. The person in need of government assistance may have lost a job they held for years, be facing mounting medical bills due to illness, or lost their partner.  The person who is always smiling may be wearing a mask to hide the pain and heartbreak they are experiencing.

We simply never know what another's circumstance may be and oddly enough, those circumstances can change at the drop of a hat.  While we cannot control what happens from one day to the next, we can make the choice let our pre-conceived notions about others go.  We can choose patience, understanding, and empathy rather than anger, irritation, and judgement.  If given the opportunity, we can reach further than the surface and take the time to really get to know people.

I encourage you to reach out to one person this week, take the time to ask them how they're doing, and really listen.  Inquire about their interests.  Ask them about their family.  Set aside what you think you know and you may be surprised to find something entirely different lies beneath the surface. Your perception of them may change and with any luck, it will be the beginning of a change that will bring much joy and peace to your life.